I Want to Be a Poet

Like a fading piece of cloth
I am a failure.

When I first read this I thought for sure it was going to be another depressing poem.
Maybe it's that word failure,
It's such a heavy word to throw around that when I hear I become depressed
I think about all that I have failed,
I think about what I may currently be failing,
Mostly I think of what if I do fail, how bad will that make me?

No longer do I cover tables filled with food and laughter
My seams are frayed my hems falling my strength no longer able
To hold the hot and cold

My depression deepens after reading this.
Not only did we fail the first time,
But apparently we continued to fail, leading us to the breaking point
When we are no longer holding ourselves together anymore
When we are no longer allowed to be ourselves,
That is depressing.

I wish for those first days
When just woven I could keep water
From seeping through
Repelled stains with the tightness of my weave
Dazzled the sunlight with my
Reflection

Regrets
I wish for a life of no regrets
I wish to be able to look back and realize that
I did the best I could
I think I will work on that

I grow old though pleased with my memories
The tasks I can no longer complete
Are balanced by the love of the tasks gone past

See we’re looking up now
Life was good,
We might have regrets, but they are small in comparison,
Comparison to what we have accomplished
The memories of the good times,
What a great sigh of relief

I offer no apology only this plea:
When I am frayed and strained and drizzle at the end
Please someone cut a square and put me in a quilt
That I might keep some child warm
And some old person with no one else to talk to
Will hear my whispers
And cuddle near

All we want is to be remembered,
To find out that what we did in life meant something
Us being there made a difference in someone else’s life
Service, we hope that we can be remembered for what we did for others
We will be there when others need us most
We will be a friend

What a happy ending to a depressing beginning
I guess that just goes to prove
No matter how bad a situation may seem,
We can always make it better.

~Elle Woods

P.S. this was my analysis of the poem Quilts by Nikki Giovanni
The way she captured the opposites of happy and sad
The way she exemplified how different outlooks really make a difference
She really makes me wish I was a poet.